While I was thinking about how my friend called me manipulative, I had to go back to Dallas for work.
It was for the same client, but the work was different. We were going to do some IT work for the client this time. I wasn’t doing the IT work, but our Company was. So IT people came with us.
Since the Company tries to minimize costs to the client, we usually all stay at the same place and rent one car. That means we usually have dinner together because we’re ending the night at the same place. Also, it’s usually a new city for us, so we stick together.
Two IT people were with us this week. On the first night the entire team wasn’t there, so only one of them went out to dinner with me. The other people on the team were from Dallas, so they go home for dinner with their families.
We go to some pizza place and we’re having a good time. Conversation is flowing. We’re laughing and getting to know each other. It was great. It was good.
At no point during the dinner was I looking to get anything from her. I was in the moment.
After the dinner, when all of this popped into my head, I realized there was nothing I could really get from her. She wasn’t going to help me with my work. At most, since the IT people aren’t coming back, I would see her again next year and that’s if we keep the client.
But did I know that while I was talking to her?
I don’t think so.
Either subconsciously I knew it, so good for me for being so subconsciously smart and can I be a bad person if my subconscious is in charge, or I didn’t know it at the time, so good for me I’m a good person.
It’s probably a coin flip. So why not give myself the benefit of the doubt.